Mastered; or a desire to be.

My thoughts today are coming from 2 Peter 2:17-22. (... for a man is a slave to whatever has mastered him.)

For the last several months I've, yet again, found myself really dropping the ball when it comes to being a Christ Follower and living according to His calling. This happens all too often and every time it does happen it gets that much more frustrating. I see all this time wasted, all these relationships that could have been more fruitful.... if I hadn't been so... lazy. More than that, I get to the point where my pride gets in the way of conviction. I very much feel the conviction but I don't want to admit it or change it. All because I simply don't want to right now. Procrastination.

What...the....junk?!

As always, it's been a slow going getting back on my feet.

My mom gave me a book to read by Francine Rivers called "A Voice in the Wind". It's about this young Jewess named Hadassah who was a christian. She was taken from her home in Jerusalem and sold as a slave in Rome. SPOILER ALERT. She's bought into a home to serve as the young daughters personal slave. The family worshiped pagan gods and goddesses, which at first really freaked Hadassah out. She clung to her relationship with God and served this household with true love, compassion, loyalty and freedom. It confused her owners to the point of questioning her about how she, who has nothing and is nothing, can be so content and serve with such love. It opened up the door for her to talk about this 'unseen god' that she loved and served. She believed that God calls us all to a life of servant hood. She served her owners well because she believed that she was, through them, directly serving her Lord.
The story goes on, she completely loves every member of this family, serves them faithfully, no matter what. Hadassah, near the end of the book is given the choice; renounce your faith or die. She stood firm and lost her life. Before she died she was asked why she didn't just lie to save her life. She responded "I've given up what I cannot keep, for something I can never lose"

This book, and her story, has challenged me and encouraged me. It's also reminded me of what it's like to live in that kind of freedom. Also showing me how easy it can be to lose sight of that. Every self serving decision I make brings me closer to being a slave to myself. I can't free me. I've given my heart to many, but Christ lives to set me free.

To Christ I give up what I cannont keep, for something I can never lose. Thanks Hadassah. :)

This has been a spiritual update on me. Obviously. :) If you took the time to read it all, I appreciate it.

Thank you for your continued prayer for Josh and I. We love it, we need it. We're blessed to be surrounded by you.

loves,
samantha