A Heart That Holds On

Sometimes it takes defeat to remind me that God is my Father, my true Abba. 

Sometimes it takes heart break to remind me that I serve a King who seeks to romance me.

Sometimes it takes isolation to remind me that I have a Redeemer who came and sacrificed it all so that I may dwell in His presence.

It takes His perfect love to remind me why we suffer.

Dangit, I really want to be someone who suffers well. I want to be someone that God can trust with hard times. The last few weeks have been testing me a lot. I've felt defeated, emotionally, a few times over. God has been taking me to a place within myself that I haven't wanted to visit for a while and I had quite honestly forgot about for a long time. It's hard, right now, because I can feel when my spirit and flesh want to rebel, but it's teaching me self-control and submission, which is exactly what I prayed the Lord would teach me (go figure). 

Josh and I are praying our way through finances, we want to learn more how to put God first in our finances. The message at church this last Sunday was about stress, and the dude went on to say that for over 15 years, he and his wife haven't fought over money. Josh and I don't fight over it, but we don't ever want to either. We want to implement a way to give back to God before we do anything else with our money. God, save, bills and learn to live on the rest. Apparently that's the key to not fighting with your spouse on money. We're going to test it out. I'll let you know how it goes. 

We're currently praying through schooling options for Josh. Moody is still in the running but Josh has been feeling lately that he doesn't want to miss out on the social experience of college. He wants to be able to participate in discussions on what he's learning and get mentoring and such. Which I'm all for. We don't want to take any short cuts. So, if it's Moody, it may look like moving to Chicago for a few years. PRAY WITH US. It's a big decision, considering it would mean putting off buying a house and having kids. In addition to Moody, he's looking into local colleges like North Central and Northwestern. 

Work is going really well. This summer has been amazing. 6 weeks left and then summer is over! By the end of it, we'll be able to say we didn't take any of it for granted. 

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Last night, I drove up to Camp Lebanon to say hello to my ladies. They graduated from high school this year and it is their last summer to be campers, and I have had the honor of getting to know them and walking along side them over the last four years. They really have turned into strong, beautiful young women and now it's their turn to change hearts with their lives. So to my girls, Sasha, Marissa, Becca, Sarah, Jamie and the other girls who couldn't be there this week...I'm praying for you always and I know that you will do great things where ever God sends you. Be prepared to be challenged. I'm proud of you, and I love you so so so much!

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Well, Josh will be home from work soon and I want to make dinner so, thanks for reading. Thanks for praying, connect with us! We'd love it. 

Take joy,

Samantha

Have me a blast!

Oh man, where does time go?
Don't answer that.

Mostly, I feel very busy lately. Which is odd because I'm not working more than usual. Oh, I know... I've been biking my hiney off. Josh and I will bike around Centerville Lake (4.2 miles) almost every day. On Wednesdays I bike 8 miles to go to the gym with my mom. I want buns of steel! That and it's sooo beautiful outside and I really don't want to take this nice weather for granted. Next thing you know, we'll be standing in 3 feet of snow cursing the sky. It's true, I'm dramatic.

So anyways, I have some things that I'm super excited about.

I went through a 'thing' a while ago where I was losing a mentor (she's still my friend but the mentor relationship has changed) and I was really yearning having a woman in my life that could teach me about being an adult, a wife and someday a mother. I also really wanted someone who could mentor me spiritually. What do you know? My prayers were answered! (Praise be to God, for sure) I've been working with a woman for almost a year. She's godly, she's mature, she's a wife, she's a mother and she is so many things that I've been wanting in a mentor.  We had our first Wise One/ Grasshopper date before we went on break for the 4th and it was awesome to tell someone about my life. I mean, really tell someone about my life. It was great to hear about her life too, how her and her husband got their start. What it was like for her growing up. Her thoughts on family and prayer life. I don't have many words for it, other than I'm thrilled and super happy to have her in my life.

Soo, my 4th of July holiday was pretty good. I got to go to the cabin, finally. This is one of my favorite holidays. My family does the same thing every year. We go to Balsam Lake, Wisconsin... lots of food, lots of sun and a firework show over the water. What's not to love?  Here's a few pictures...

I like my marshmellows burned.

Josh had a blasty blast on my uncle's jet ski.

Sister Sara was able to join us.

Christmas card photo? I think so.

Oh, and volleyball!

Obviously, it was a good time :)

I know I say this every time, but we are sooo close to paying off our debt and having our down payment for a house. I definitely think it could happen by October or November. It feels really good to be so close. However, I will miss all the time I've been getting to spend with my family.

Lots of weddings this month. Lots of reasons to get new dresses. Don't you just looove weddings? I do!

Well shoot.

I've been reading the book of Hosea. It's been a good reminder of God's faithfulness and the extent in which he pursues us. If you haven't read the book Redeeming Love, you should. It's the Hosea and Gomer story and it's life changing.

That about does it. I'm getting distracted because I'm watching Ninja Warrior so I keep forgetting what I wanted to say next.

Seriously, I'm ending it now.

kbyee

Ss <3